No matter who you are, what disabilities you may have been born with or acquired later in life, whether you were born into loving families or abusive ones, there is one fact which is true for all of us. We were born with potential. Every one of us has the potential to be successful in life. By successful I mean creating your life in a way that brings you happiness and fulfilment. Being successful also means you have learned to love and receive love in return. Jesus said there are two commandments: to love God with all your heart, soul and mind and to love your neighbour as He loves us. (Luke 10:27) When we do, we receive love in return and become filled with joy and the love and joy expands outwards to others. However, in order to love everyone and to love purely, we must learn to do so. We have this potential. It is in our make-up. We are created in love with the innate potential to love. Love and Happiness then become our muse and inspire us to do greater things.
Show him the door
Yet, sometimes we fall into despondency and despair when terrible things happen. The ability to love can often become hindered when we ourselves are raised without love. If we were raised by overly critical or contemptuous parents, we learn to hate ourselves. Some of us may have learned self-hate in the school-yard even though we may have had loving parents. For others it may be that we slowly start to dislike ourselves when we have experienced some form of perceived failure or have been criticized by others in the workplace when we are adults. Sadly, we each have an inner voice which harshly judges us. If we listen, this voice grows louder. This voice hinders us from being our best. The voice tells us we can’t succeed or we are unlovable or unattractive or not smart enough. The good news is that potentiality is still within us. It is only dormant. In order to awaken our potential, we have to silence the Accuser (that judging voice inside us). When we start to think negatively about ourselves, recognize it for what it is, a judging voice that will hinder our goals in life and come in-between our relationships. This voice does not speak the truth. It is the voice of the Accuser. If the Accuser was a real person and just walked into your room right now and began to berate you and put you down, what would you do? Would you tell him that he is so right and then break down crying? What would you rather do? Think about it. Personally, if someone came into my home and started to talk to me that way, I would show him the door. I would let him know that he is not welcome here. We can do the same when our negative thoughts appear. We can (inwardly) tell it to shut up and go away and then replace the negative judging thoughts with thoughts of affirmation. This works because all successes begin with love. You have to love yourself enough to want to change your thought patterns. We can then move forward in life.
Send in the Cavalry!
Now, to be fair, this isn’t always easy. For one thing, it takes some practice. Another thing is that sometimes you have more than one accuser in your head. You may have a whole market place of accusers who are all yammering at once, making you feel pretty unconfident. In a scenario like this, you will need to pray (Mark9:29) and you may have to implement more than one strategy to silence them all. In some cases, this may require help with a Therapist or Spiritual Mentor. Another very effective way is to use meditation to focus on statements of affirmation. The more positive thoughts about yourself you bring into your inner market place, the more negative thoughts begin to leave. (Picture an old Western town where the guys in black hats have taken over the town but then the cavalry turns up and the guys in the black hats are chased away on horse-back). I will be posting a meditation example for this type of inner walk later this week. The thing to remember is not to allow yourself to despair and realize that you can succeed in turning around your thinking process.